Museum trip



I went to the British Museum the other day. I was a chaperone on a field trip with the 10th graders in their European History course. As you can imagine from the pics above, the topic was ancient Greece and Rome.

I haven't been to the British Museum in ages! It was so cool! I looked at pieces from the Parthenon, old jewelry and statues that had amazing details. And this was in only a few rooms!
I am planning on going back some time this winter to see the newest exhibition, the Terracotta Army. It's a shame that I don't ever take the time, especially during the summer, to see all these amazing sites that are here on offer in London. I ought to be ashamed of myself. So I'm going to do it. After hockey season is done with the kids, I'm going to try to take one afternoon a month (at least) to explore museums.

In Memorium

This picture shoes the last time I spent with my dog, Amber. It was the day after my wedding and I was heading packing things up. Amber decided she needed to keep me there and plopped herself on my stuff. We got to have a little cuddle and then she went home to my brother's house.

I got Amber when I was working at EHS, a boarding school in Virginia. She was rescued from a family who just couldn't keep her. They hadn't trained her and she was wild. They said she was four, but when I took her to the vet, they said she was only two...and still a puppy. Amber learned to live by my rules and became a much better behaved young lady of a dog. She was a friend through all my stress of working with teenagers. And she protected me from the bad men who tried to break my heart...she knew before I did that they were not nice...or in one instance, that the guy was cheating on me. She had the best instincts...and I learned from her.

When my brother starting talking about how they'd love to have a dog, but weren't sure about training...and I knew I was going to be moving to a place which wouldn't accept dogs...I knew that she was meant for him and my sis-in-law. And they have loved her like I did. Amber became the protector of their baby as soon as he was born. I wish Ryan would have had more time with his dog.

Amber was special. And a lot of us will miss her. Someday I'll get another dog...but it won't be the same as my first 'best friend'. Love ya Amber. Miss ya!

Sad News

This is an email my sister-in-law sent to me about Amber, a gorgeous platinum blond yellow lab and I gave up when I moved....she is currently living with my brother, sister-in-law and their baby. She's so protective of Ryan...And she's the first dog I've ever owned on my own. I miss her.

"Glad all is going well. Just wanted to give you an update on Amber in case we have some more bad news later today. Amber has been struggling with her right back leg since earlier this summer. At first the vet thought she had clown out her knee. She was on some medication and limited walking. She had a great time in Maine and swam a lot. We took her back for a follow-up visit when we returned and he figured out (at least said he figured out) that her problem had something do with her spine and spinal fluid. She was limping a bit but could walk more. Basically something was effecting her nervous system as she often curled up her right back foot when she stood. Well, yesterday we can home and she couldn’t put any weight on her back right leg. She was fine in the morning and Ev picked up Max earlier in the afternoon and said something was wrong with her back leg. I assumed just that she was limping a bit. Worse than that – she is basically a 3 legged dog at this point. We have a call into the vet and will most likely be in there some time today. She can eat and drinks her water, but can’t move much beyond the door way and it took lots of effort just to take her out to pee. She can’t do anything else. I’m very worried, but she is at least in good spirits and eating. I tell you this not to worry you, but just to let you know and keep you updated. I have a bad feeling in my stomach, but we’ll just have to wait and see what the doctor has to say.Sorry to lay this on you know, but I didn’t want more information to be a total shock. Take care, C."

Edited on 21 Sept: Here's a pic of my lovely dog with my nephew...she's always trying to be around him. They find out today if she needs to be put down. Keeping my fingers crossed...

It's all relative!

This past weekend I got to meet up with a few of Roy's relatives. We met at his parent's house and then off to dinner at the Gaucho Grill in Hampstead. It was a party of six - his parents, his aunt and uncle (mom's side) and the two of us newlyweds. The Gaucho Grill has very yummy steaks and is quite a funky restaurant. It's not a romantic place, as the music is loud and the place is very dark. Chairs were covered with animal print, dark wood was all over the place and lights were dimmed with a reddish tone. Even the bathrooms were darkly lit with what seemed to be candles. I guess it's a place for mystery or to be 'seen'.

We had a good time and the visiting relatives tried to pay, but Roy's mom got to the waitress too fast. They still tried to ply their credit card on the waitress, who asked, quite cheekily, if she could use it to buy a new Fendi bag. Cute.

We left the restaurant to wait for Roy to bring the car around...yes, we packed ourselves all in one vehicle (illegal, yes, I know). And as we were waiting, I could hear the uncle say, well, we didn't get the waitress a bag, but we could get one for Liane. "Hey, Liane...what colour bag would you like? Do you like black?" I played along thinking that this would never happen...and yes, black is always my preferred bag colour though I do own several other coloured items.

I don't know why, but we offered to cook dinner for everyone on Tuesday night (last night). With all the craziness going on in my life, it wasn't the most brilliant idea, but in the end it worked out.

I baked a bit on Sunday...trying to make baked donuts which really resembled a nice yeasty bun instead...so we decided to use those for dinner. We chopped all the veg on Monday night and let it marinate with chili and olive oil.

There wasn't too much to do on Tuesday evening, after walking home from my high school field hockey practice...I chopped a bit, put a few things together, cleaned a touch and then put it all in the oven. Garlic and parmesan crusted chicken. No, I don't have a recipe I follow, it's just become my easy signature dish. The side was veg (potato, onion, garlic and pepper) baked in tin foil. It turned out all lovely and yummy.

We all enjoyed some wine and the meal. And surprising me, was a gift of a bag from DKNY. It's a lovely black bag, medium sized...much nicer than anything I currently own. Woo hoo! Cooking for relatives as a newlywed definitely has it's perks!

So they leave tomorrow and I'm meant to head to the in-laws for dinner tonight. Not sure how I feel about it as I'm struggling to stay awake as it is...and coughing up a storm. Wish this cold would go away. But it will be something I'll do...because it is expected. And yes, I am a good wife with Indian relatives. Sometimes you just have to play the game. And I'm lucky that it's not that hard to do, cause my new relatives are all so nice!

Up, up and away....

I always complain about men being big ol' babies when they get sick. I usually power through and do what I have to in work and home. But the past few days, I just want to be a baby too...I feel like whining up a storm...staying home and sleeping in. Not doing any work. Awww...poor me. Which is so pathetic. And so not me.

I was raised by a man who was so proud that he had only missed two days of work in 25 years of service to the school where he worked. Now this meant that he probably passed on some serious illnesses to the kids he worked with...but he was there. He was a guy who never went to the doctor - that was for wimps. And he passed this on a bit to his kids. We were the ones who had the spotless records at school...several years of perfect attendance. And when we got to work - how could we miss for any reason? I've moved beyond my dad and won't go in if I'm throwing up or feeling like death...but I still made it to work once during a blizzard, to keep the office going (I worked as a PA at the time).

I do go to the doctor, but only in extreme emergencies, like breaking a wrist. But didn't go when I dislocated my jaw...ice would work out fine.

I don't like that I've learned this habit. As a counselor, I preach taking care of yourself both physically and mentally. I don't want to be superwoman. I'm human. And I don't want to pass this on to any future generation.

So this week I did do a few things for myself. I took one day off from coaching and I came in later to work today (missed the first period class). I probably ought to have called off sick for the full day...but I couldn't let down a few kids who needed to see me today.

I'm not totally moving from being a superwoman...but at least I'm slowly admitting to being more like the human I am.

In the midst of madness...

It's been a while since I've written anything in here. But then again, I haven't exactly been spending a lot of fun or quality time on the internet. I have been, in a word, busy. It's a busy that I haven't experienced in a long time. It's been an OVERWHELMING sort of busy. One where I almost cried in front of my boss. One where I've gotten sick cause I just can't slow down. And that's huge. I NEVER get sick. Hardly ever.

It seemed to hit all of a sudden - teaching two classes, grading, coming up with a curriculum for my two programs, meeting with teachers, parents, students during day and evening (two nights out until 9pm at school), coaching and starting to play field hockey, plus all the paperwork involved in getting a bunch of groups out on a field trip to a variety of places (damn paperwork!).

So I'm tired. I feel dead. I'd love to have a sick day, but don't have the time...something that is crazy to me, but so true. I never understood people who said that until now. I truly cannot miss work right now. And once I get back to that point, I'll probably feel fine.

Tonight I'm giving my personal field hockey practice a miss. I just need the relaxation from 7pm onward. I couldn't rush home, eat a small something and then head out to practice from 8-10 pm. I don't get to bed until well past 11pm as I need to shower and relax before sleep will come. It's my one concession that may cost my place on the Ladies' First Team...and to be honest, right now, I don't care. I just want a good solid night of sleep. And time to spend with my gorgeously lovely husband.

I want to talk to him about selling our flat (which got a very low offer the other day, by the way). What to do about our estate agent who isn't sending us our contract and so we're not in any advertisement. To talk about our strategies.

One good thing that is happening today - we are having our flat cleaned for us. It will be a weekly thing. She arrived at 9am (hopefully) where Roy gave her keys and showed her the cleaning materials. I do hope it works, as it will take a lot of stress away. I never thought I'd have someone come to clean...but right now I just can't take that on as well. It'll be a short-term solution, but one I welcome!

So those are a few things I'm going to do to help keep me sane and healthy. I hope to feel better so I can go to the gym this weekend as well as play field hockey. I'm trying to eat better and drink tons of water. Even in the craziness of it all...I still try to do something nice for myself.

And it begins...

So...we decided to invite our preferred real estate agency to come and valuate the flat. They arrived yesterday, met by Roy, and took a look around. They then stated that the flat is worth a minimum of £275,000...but that we ought to put it on the market for £290,000 and realistically, it ought to sell for around £285,000. So after some thought, we decided to go with this agency and they came tonight (I'm still at work for 'Back to School Night') to take pics and get the contract signed. They already have viewings lined up - two tomorrow and two on Saturday!!! Can you believe it? We may have it off the market in a few weeks!!! Fast moving market or what?!

Therapy

One of the toughest decisions for some people to make is the one to see a therapist. And that's understandable. Even in today's supposedly enlightened world, there are still some taboos about seeing someone to help you with a problem. It's a shame that some people see seeking out help as being weak instead of being strong...but that will probably never change.

So, let's say you have decided to see a therapist. Who do you go and see? The best thing is to get recommendations from people you know (if you are comfy doing this). If you don't know anyone who has seen a therapist, then as your doctor for a recommendation. For most problems, the first stop is a psychologist, who can assess your issues. But if you think you have a very severe problem, such as clinical depression or anxiety, then it might be best to find a psychiatrist. What is the difference? The psychiatrist is medically trained and therefore is the only type of counselor who is able to give you medication.

There are many different types of therapists and their views on therapy. Don't feel that if you go to one and they don't fit or feel right, that you need to stick with them. Therapists will often even help you find someone new. But don't move only if you feel uncomfortable in therapy - that's a big part of the process. Move if you feel they don't 'hear' you or they seem to be giving you advice that runs totally counter to your instincts. I tend to encourage people to give a therapist at least 3 sessions before they move, just to work through the discomfort of just being in therapy.

Therapy is hard work. It is not fun. You may feel even worse on some days when you leave. But it should always make you think. You should leave with questions for yourself...things to work through.

I'm a huge fan of cognitive-behavioral psychology for a lot of problems. The focus is on changing the way you think, which in turn may help you deal with your behaviors and your emotions. It's used a ton in sports psychology, for anxiety and stress as well as many other issues. But most therapists, even if they have a particular 'bent', will also use techniques from other types of therapy.

When I'm looking for an outside therapist for a kid, I ask them a few questions:

a. Do you want a male or female. For some people, this is very important. For others, it just doesn't matter.

b. Do you care if the person is younger or older. Some people want the long-term perspective and experience, others want to work with someone who is closer to their age and may understand what's happening to the youth of today.

c. Are you ready to be open with this person.

And that is the most important question of them all. A person who is not open will not gain a thing from therapy. This is a person who will not judge you...they have probably heard a lot worse than anything you will tell them, and even if not, this is their job - to listen. If you hold back, then you are keeping a therapist and, quite honestly, yourself, from doing the best job. Cause that's one thing people forget or don't know about therapy - YOU know yourself the best, and so YOU are the one who can help yourself more than anyone else...a good therapist will help guide you and ask you the questions that you might not want to/be able to ask yourself.