STOP!
Public transportation can be frustrating even in the best of times. And usually I can just blow it off. But not today.
I saw the C-11 bus pulling past my stop as I came out of the car park this morning (we have private parking for our flat). That's not unusual so I figured I'd get the 189 or the next C-11. As I was standing on the sidewalk, trying to cross the road to my stop, I saw the 189 in the distance. Score!
There was a small break in the traffic so that I could run across just before the bus was getting to my stop. I was waving my arms to let the bus driver know to stop.
AND HE DIDN'T. That's right. I signalled to him that I wanted the bus. But he kept going.
I am not one to curse, but I just let out a storm. What a "!$£(*%*(£!!!!!
So today, I went back to the train, which I made just in time. And somehow it wasn't over-crowded too much so I didn't have to squeeze in or yell to get people to move, which is the reason why I stopped going on the train. So maybe, at least this week, I'll go back and try the train out again. Cause I am that pissed off at the buses today.
27 November 2007
26 November 2007
Gotta get me a shot
I don't have much fear about getting Delhi Belly. I have quite a strong stomach, I'll be in good hands and I barely felt a twinge of anything the last time I went to India for two weeks. Maybe I was born with a lot of good bacteria that does strong work or something.
But I did have a HUGE fear of having to get injections as a preventative measure. Cause I didn't get them before my last trip and my husband was 'highly encouraging' me to go get them this time.
When I was much younger, a small girl, I developed a phobia about needles and bees. My dad and I think that somehow they are connected (sting/needle...it works). I would scream bloody murder if a bee flew anywhere near me. But it was worse for my parents if I had to go to the doctors.
One year, I found out that I was going to be getting an injection. Probably one of those things that you have to get every few years or so. I don't know why they did it, but they left me on my own in the examining room. There was a huge black plastic bin for garbage. When the nurse returned to give me my shot, I wasn't visible. Yes, that's right, I was in hiding in the bin. I cared more about getting a shot than about getting into garbage.
As I got older, I continued to have problems with shots. As a sophomore in college, I was required to get another MMR as my generation's shot didn't 'take' or something like that. I went in, trying to be calm. And I was. But after I left the room, I sat down and passed out. I could see the black veil coming over my eyes. It wasn't a good feeling.
I decided once I began to teach and had to help with a blood drive that I needed to get over it. And the only way was to actually give blood. I have a desirable blood type, so it made sense. The first time, I both passed out and threw up. I still feel sorry for the nurses who had to deal with me for one hour. The next time, I just passed out. And it got better and better. I was still anxious, still felt a bit sick/dizzy, but I felt that I had beaten this phobia through the power of CBT.
So now, three years after having not gotten a shot or given blood (not sure why), I had to go and get injections for India. And the fear returned. Would I pass out? Would I get sick?
Well...I did some of my old breathing and self-talk stuff...and I was fine. Yes, I was anxious, but I didn't even feel a touch dizzy. But man, that Typhoid injection really, really hurts later on...I could barely move my arm for two days and even now, a few more days later, I can feel the site where the shot took place!
I don't have much fear about getting Delhi Belly. I have quite a strong stomach, I'll be in good hands and I barely felt a twinge of anything the last time I went to India for two weeks. Maybe I was born with a lot of good bacteria that does strong work or something.
But I did have a HUGE fear of having to get injections as a preventative measure. Cause I didn't get them before my last trip and my husband was 'highly encouraging' me to go get them this time.
When I was much younger, a small girl, I developed a phobia about needles and bees. My dad and I think that somehow they are connected (sting/needle...it works). I would scream bloody murder if a bee flew anywhere near me. But it was worse for my parents if I had to go to the doctors.
One year, I found out that I was going to be getting an injection. Probably one of those things that you have to get every few years or so. I don't know why they did it, but they left me on my own in the examining room. There was a huge black plastic bin for garbage. When the nurse returned to give me my shot, I wasn't visible. Yes, that's right, I was in hiding in the bin. I cared more about getting a shot than about getting into garbage.
As I got older, I continued to have problems with shots. As a sophomore in college, I was required to get another MMR as my generation's shot didn't 'take' or something like that. I went in, trying to be calm. And I was. But after I left the room, I sat down and passed out. I could see the black veil coming over my eyes. It wasn't a good feeling.
I decided once I began to teach and had to help with a blood drive that I needed to get over it. And the only way was to actually give blood. I have a desirable blood type, so it made sense. The first time, I both passed out and threw up. I still feel sorry for the nurses who had to deal with me for one hour. The next time, I just passed out. And it got better and better. I was still anxious, still felt a bit sick/dizzy, but I felt that I had beaten this phobia through the power of CBT.
So now, three years after having not gotten a shot or given blood (not sure why), I had to go and get injections for India. And the fear returned. Would I pass out? Would I get sick?
Well...I did some of my old breathing and self-talk stuff...and I was fine. Yes, I was anxious, but I didn't even feel a touch dizzy. But man, that Typhoid injection really, really hurts later on...I could barely move my arm for two days and even now, a few more days later, I can feel the site where the shot took place!
24 November 2007
In goal
I stand there. My right hand is getting a bit cold, but that makes sense as the goalie glove covering it is not as closed as the one on my left hand. Can't believe that when we got here the pitch was frozen. But we're playing this game as no one wants to have to come out this early in a few weeks time. Let's get it over with. We're okay with playing.
The ball is at the other end of the pitch. 'Come on West Hampstead', I call. I hope that they can keep it up there. Maybe even score.
The ball moved down the pitch. One of the forwards did a bad tackle. Tweet. It's the oppo's ball. A hard hit and they are halfway toward my goal. Come on girls, get a move on it. Block that ball.
Ah, no, it's gotten past my midfield line. I hope that someone goes on her. 'Kelly, take her', I shout. But the ball gets passed to their best player, who then does a great move past her defender.
It's just her and me. I can do this. Focus on the ball. Should I slide? No, stay up. Ready on your toes. That's it, you got the shot. Now get ready in case it comes back your way.
'Push it out right', 'Come on do it', yelling as hard as I can. And off it goes, back across the 50. Another moment in time. Another feeling of relief that they didn't score. Breathe out.
'Come on Hampstead. Keep it up there.'
I stand there. My right hand is getting a bit cold, but that makes sense as the goalie glove covering it is not as closed as the one on my left hand. Can't believe that when we got here the pitch was frozen. But we're playing this game as no one wants to have to come out this early in a few weeks time. Let's get it over with. We're okay with playing.
The ball is at the other end of the pitch. 'Come on West Hampstead', I call. I hope that they can keep it up there. Maybe even score.
The ball moved down the pitch. One of the forwards did a bad tackle. Tweet. It's the oppo's ball. A hard hit and they are halfway toward my goal. Come on girls, get a move on it. Block that ball.
Ah, no, it's gotten past my midfield line. I hope that someone goes on her. 'Kelly, take her', I shout. But the ball gets passed to their best player, who then does a great move past her defender.
It's just her and me. I can do this. Focus on the ball. Should I slide? No, stay up. Ready on your toes. That's it, you got the shot. Now get ready in case it comes back your way.
'Push it out right', 'Come on do it', yelling as hard as I can. And off it goes, back across the 50. Another moment in time. Another feeling of relief that they didn't score. Breathe out.
'Come on Hampstead. Keep it up there.'
23 November 2007
Nanny
My grandmother, Nanny, died in her sleep the night before Thanksgiving. So I got a call yesterday afternoon about it. Nanny was my cool grandmother. She had been born in England and came over the US with her family when she was only 9. She was an artist who had gotten her degree in Italy and then went on to teach at a private school in NJ. Nanny had the travel bug and every time we went to visit, showed me something she had collected in her world travels. And I mean world - she and my grandpa (or on her own after he died) went to every continent and so many countries. I got my bug to travel and explore from her. I came to appreciate the world of art from her. In her last year, she was struggling as she was finally fully blind (a degenerative eye disease) and wheelchair bound. She was very ready to die at the age of 91. I won't be able to go back for a funeral and I'll miss her a lot. She was my inspiration.
My grandmother, Nanny, died in her sleep the night before Thanksgiving. So I got a call yesterday afternoon about it. Nanny was my cool grandmother. She had been born in England and came over the US with her family when she was only 9. She was an artist who had gotten her degree in Italy and then went on to teach at a private school in NJ. Nanny had the travel bug and every time we went to visit, showed me something she had collected in her world travels. And I mean world - she and my grandpa (or on her own after he died) went to every continent and so many countries. I got my bug to travel and explore from her. I came to appreciate the world of art from her. In her last year, she was struggling as she was finally fully blind (a degenerative eye disease) and wheelchair bound. She was very ready to die at the age of 91. I won't be able to go back for a funeral and I'll miss her a lot. She was my inspiration.
20 November 2007
On the bus...
I'm an eavesdropper by nature. I know, it's a bad habit. But I never do it to people I know...good excuse, eh?
The bus always seems to be a great place to listen in to all sorts of funny conversations, from two little old ladies talking about the best place to get their hair set to the near incomprehensible chatter of the little kids.
Yesterday, I got onto a very packed bus, so I had to go to the very back and sit next to two teenage girls on their way home from school. From the conversation I gathered that they were around 14 or 15.
Just as I plotted next to them, the word 'sex' came out. I couldn't help myself. I had to listen from that moment onward. It's not a long trip - about 10 minutes - so I was certain that this little snippet would be quite interesting...and yes, it was that.
They began by talking about first times, their own as well as other girls. I was a bit disturbed that at such a young age they were talking about how wonderful it all ways and whatnot. That so many of their friends had done it for the first time in their early teens. I'm almost certain that the 'wonderfulness' was more that a boy wanted them and was 'showing their love', than any true pleasure. Teenagers are not known for their unselfishness and so I'm almost certain that most boys would have no clue how to, let's say, pleasure these girls.
One girl then moved on to talk about how much she missed sex. (At 15?!!) And the word, vibrator, came up. They declared that no, vibrators are only for lonely ugly lesbians. Oh, how I wanted to let them know that many heterosexual women and indeed couples actually loved vibrators and that they could be part of a healthy sexual life. But I held back.
Finally they talked about how they got caught by their parents in different ways - be it a hickey or in bed with a boy. All I know is that if Roy or I catch a child of ours in bed with someone else at that age, they won't be seeing daylight until they are 25. And their partner might start running now, cause it wouldn't be pretty.
Oh the meanderings of teenage girls. Ten minutes of sex talk. Giggles. And sighs. I just had to get off the bus, shaking my head, and hope that I can teach my kids to wait until they are a bit more mature and emotionally ready to handle it all. And that sex, by that time, is still something to treasure.
I'm an eavesdropper by nature. I know, it's a bad habit. But I never do it to people I know...good excuse, eh?
The bus always seems to be a great place to listen in to all sorts of funny conversations, from two little old ladies talking about the best place to get their hair set to the near incomprehensible chatter of the little kids.
Yesterday, I got onto a very packed bus, so I had to go to the very back and sit next to two teenage girls on their way home from school. From the conversation I gathered that they were around 14 or 15.
Just as I plotted next to them, the word 'sex' came out. I couldn't help myself. I had to listen from that moment onward. It's not a long trip - about 10 minutes - so I was certain that this little snippet would be quite interesting...and yes, it was that.
They began by talking about first times, their own as well as other girls. I was a bit disturbed that at such a young age they were talking about how wonderful it all ways and whatnot. That so many of their friends had done it for the first time in their early teens. I'm almost certain that the 'wonderfulness' was more that a boy wanted them and was 'showing their love', than any true pleasure. Teenagers are not known for their unselfishness and so I'm almost certain that most boys would have no clue how to, let's say, pleasure these girls.
One girl then moved on to talk about how much she missed sex. (At 15?!!) And the word, vibrator, came up. They declared that no, vibrators are only for lonely ugly lesbians. Oh, how I wanted to let them know that many heterosexual women and indeed couples actually loved vibrators and that they could be part of a healthy sexual life. But I held back.
Finally they talked about how they got caught by their parents in different ways - be it a hickey or in bed with a boy. All I know is that if Roy or I catch a child of ours in bed with someone else at that age, they won't be seeing daylight until they are 25. And their partner might start running now, cause it wouldn't be pretty.
Oh the meanderings of teenage girls. Ten minutes of sex talk. Giggles. And sighs. I just had to get off the bus, shaking my head, and hope that I can teach my kids to wait until they are a bit more mature and emotionally ready to handle it all. And that sex, by that time, is still something to treasure.
15 November 2007
Grease!
The very name brings back memories of standing on a friend's bed, hairbrush in hand, record player twirling as we belt out the songs to our favorite movie. We were too young to have a crush on Danny...but thought it'd be cool to be Sandy.
I've seen the movie a dozen or so times. And when the songs come on the radio or at a dance, I'm definitely there singing my heart out.
So yesterday, when my friend Mariam asked me if I wanted to go see the show cause she won free tickets, I had to say 'YES!'. It's a cool thing that the school has promoted...if a parent has an extra ticket or two for some sort of event, they can donate it to the school who then puts out a raffle. Everything from musicals to music to museums. It's one of those little things you appreciate!
Mariam didn't have the fever. She had seen it once when she was very little. Didn't know the songs and couldn't remember the story too well. She had chosen well...I would help educate her in the world of Grease!
We talked about the music of the times, the way things were about to change and what it would have been like to grow up in the 50s. This was the time that my dad had grown up around. Music from that era had been played in my house all the time. I remember dancing with my daddy, on his feet, rockin' and a rollin' all night long (or so it goes).
The musical is not a great one, but it's tons of fun. You want to get up and dance. But as we were in the THIRD ROW, it didn't seem appropriate. We could see the actors up close, really hear them sing and see them sweat. It was amazing.
So I had a blast. It was worth being tired today to have that happy night.
Grease is the word, is the word, is the word....
The very name brings back memories of standing on a friend's bed, hairbrush in hand, record player twirling as we belt out the songs to our favorite movie. We were too young to have a crush on Danny...but thought it'd be cool to be Sandy.
I've seen the movie a dozen or so times. And when the songs come on the radio or at a dance, I'm definitely there singing my heart out.
So yesterday, when my friend Mariam asked me if I wanted to go see the show cause she won free tickets, I had to say 'YES!'. It's a cool thing that the school has promoted...if a parent has an extra ticket or two for some sort of event, they can donate it to the school who then puts out a raffle. Everything from musicals to music to museums. It's one of those little things you appreciate!
Mariam didn't have the fever. She had seen it once when she was very little. Didn't know the songs and couldn't remember the story too well. She had chosen well...I would help educate her in the world of Grease!
We talked about the music of the times, the way things were about to change and what it would have been like to grow up in the 50s. This was the time that my dad had grown up around. Music from that era had been played in my house all the time. I remember dancing with my daddy, on his feet, rockin' and a rollin' all night long (or so it goes).
The musical is not a great one, but it's tons of fun. You want to get up and dance. But as we were in the THIRD ROW, it didn't seem appropriate. We could see the actors up close, really hear them sing and see them sweat. It was amazing.
So I had a blast. It was worth being tired today to have that happy night.
Grease is the word, is the word, is the word....
13 November 2007
Free rice - it's more than just a meal
I just started playing a new game. It's on www.freerice.com. It's very cool! Here's a bit of adverstisement from their site:
About FreeRice
FreeRice is a sister site of the world poverty site, Poverty.com.
FreeRice has two goals:
Provide English vocabulary to everyone for free.
Help end world hunger by providing rice to hungry people for free.
This is made possible by the sponsors who advertise on this site.
Whether you are CEO of a large corporation or a street child in a poor country, improving your vocabulary can improve your life. It is a great investment in yourself.
Perhaps even greater is the investment your donated rice makes in hungry human beings, enabling them to function and be productive. Somewhere in the world, a person is eating rice that you helped provide.
So for every vocab word you get correct, you donate 10 grains of rice. It's a wonderful site as not only are you doing good for other people, but you also learn. And what's cool is that the site has a way of figuring out where you are in your vocab level so you aren't challenged too greatly, but challenged enough that you'll constantly get to learn new words. I think that's great. I've passed the site on to our college counselors and to the head of our English department. Kids need this!
So - join in and learn...donate your time and earn rice. Activism in this way is awesome!
I just started playing a new game. It's on www.freerice.com. It's very cool! Here's a bit of adverstisement from their site:
About FreeRice
FreeRice is a sister site of the world poverty site, Poverty.com.
FreeRice has two goals:
Provide English vocabulary to everyone for free.
Help end world hunger by providing rice to hungry people for free.
This is made possible by the sponsors who advertise on this site.
Whether you are CEO of a large corporation or a street child in a poor country, improving your vocabulary can improve your life. It is a great investment in yourself.
Perhaps even greater is the investment your donated rice makes in hungry human beings, enabling them to function and be productive. Somewhere in the world, a person is eating rice that you helped provide.
So for every vocab word you get correct, you donate 10 grains of rice. It's a wonderful site as not only are you doing good for other people, but you also learn. And what's cool is that the site has a way of figuring out where you are in your vocab level so you aren't challenged too greatly, but challenged enough that you'll constantly get to learn new words. I think that's great. I've passed the site on to our college counselors and to the head of our English department. Kids need this!
So - join in and learn...donate your time and earn rice. Activism in this way is awesome!
12 November 2007
The muscles are burning...
I'm in pain. Not as much as I was on Saturday or yesterday, but definitely more than before I left for my trip to the Netherlands.
Somehow, the other coach, Marisa, decided that since there wasn't a gym in our hotel, that we should run the stairs. All TEN flights. And four times. Two days running.
Now, as you must know from reading this, I haven't gotten into much exercise as of late, especially running of any form. So here I was, pushing myself up the stairs. And that was fine. I did a great job doing it. But the results were crazy.
My calves are burning. They are so knotted it's crazy. Walking down stairs is not pretty.
Lesson learned. Well...it could be that exercise is evil...but I've decided that it means I should do more. So today I'm going to walk home from work - it takes about 50 minutes or so to get there on a good day and it's all uphill (slightly), so it'll be a good step toward that regular exercise thing that I can do now that high school field hockey is over.
Here's a pic of my team at the game:
Yes...they are crazy!
11 November 2007
05 November 2007
It's all okay.
It's been busy, but that's no excuse to not blog for so long. I have grades due on Wednesday morning, we're heading out of town for a field hockey tourney on Wednesday, I had to grade...well, you get the gist. But still, no excuse.
Life is going okay. Roy and I have passed the six month mark and we're still having fun. We laugh a lot. We both wish we had more time to be relaxed with each other (for obvious reasons), but we're still intimate in other ways...like holding hands and smooching and the like. We just like each other and still fancy the pants off each other...it's all good.
School is going okay. I'm crazy busy with everything that is going on, and trying to get ready for a sub, plus finishing up writing comments and putting in grades for my two classes. I do enjoy teaching and seeing kids get interested. But the topic of the ear and eye and nose, etc, are not thrilling me. Can't wait to get past this so I will be more excited to teach.
Social life is going okay. Went to a party on Saturday night and it was fun. We just hung out, watched a touch of fireworks (going on for a while due to Bonfire Night and Diwali and the like) and just chatted. Good red wine rounded it all out. In the near future - will be going to see a movie with a friend next week and then having people over for Thanksgiving. Yeah, not bad. Not crazy but then again, I'm getting older...
So life. It's okay. Lots to plan. Time to look forward. And still crossing my fingers that the frickin' flat sells!
It's been busy, but that's no excuse to not blog for so long. I have grades due on Wednesday morning, we're heading out of town for a field hockey tourney on Wednesday, I had to grade...well, you get the gist. But still, no excuse.
Life is going okay. Roy and I have passed the six month mark and we're still having fun. We laugh a lot. We both wish we had more time to be relaxed with each other (for obvious reasons), but we're still intimate in other ways...like holding hands and smooching and the like. We just like each other and still fancy the pants off each other...it's all good.
School is going okay. I'm crazy busy with everything that is going on, and trying to get ready for a sub, plus finishing up writing comments and putting in grades for my two classes. I do enjoy teaching and seeing kids get interested. But the topic of the ear and eye and nose, etc, are not thrilling me. Can't wait to get past this so I will be more excited to teach.
Social life is going okay. Went to a party on Saturday night and it was fun. We just hung out, watched a touch of fireworks (going on for a while due to Bonfire Night and Diwali and the like) and just chatted. Good red wine rounded it all out. In the near future - will be going to see a movie with a friend next week and then having people over for Thanksgiving. Yeah, not bad. Not crazy but then again, I'm getting older...
So life. It's okay. Lots to plan. Time to look forward. And still crossing my fingers that the frickin' flat sells!
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