31 October 2006

Happy Halloween!

I love to dress up. Ever since I was a little girl being dressed up by my mommy until now, I have totally gotten into 'fancy dress' (as they call it here in England). The first costume I remember wearing was a large pillowcase that my mom cut eye holes into and sewed on black letters that said "BOO!". I was quite a cutie pie as a ghost. I then moved on to become a cow girl (an outfit I decided to wear for months afterwards...thanks parents for not forcing the issue on that one!), a Raggedy Ann doll and a variety of spooky characters.

Even as an adult I've gotten into Halloween. This year I am dressed up as a dark angel. It's not much of a costume but one I can get away with as a school counselor. I'm in all black (yeah!) with black wings and a black furry halo. I have my curls all funked out and dark makeup on. I think my favorite Halloween costume was when I was working in a boarding school - I dressed up like one of the kids getting ready for their football games (they usually dressed in school colours and wrote on their faces). The kids got it.

So, anyway, hope you all enjoy your day. Hope you get treats and not tricks. And....


BOO!

29 October 2006

Great day!

It's 4:30am in England. I don't know why I'm awake, but I am. So I thought I'd share what a fantastic day it was...

I got a great night's sleep. We were in bed by 11:00pm and I slept almost non-stop until 9am. Which was a good thing after the lack of sleep the night before. Having a very drunk fiance on Thursday night was not helpful...especially as he was throwing up at 3:30am. But last night...mmmmm. Gooooood!

Good news number two...I have been attempting to become a qualified England field hockey umpire this year. I took the written assessment last year (it was darn hard) and have been umpiring games since. At 11:30am, I was assessed during a game. And it was a tough game. Umpiring men's games, particularly at men's 3 level, is quite tough - they give you much stick if they think you made a poor call. But according to the 'assessor', I was quietly confident in my game calling. The best news of all is that I was asssessed to be a higher level than the normal introductory level (1D) and given a rating of 1B, which means I can umpire any game that my club plays this year! Woo hoo. It's quite an honour (and yes, I'm bragging!).

Good news three...I played for the Ladies' One team. Usually I play for the Ladies' Twos. And ya know what? I didn't give up a goal (I'm a goalie). And I made some great saves. At 37, I played at a very high level of hockey!!! Yeah, me!

Good news four...R. and I celebrated our two year anniversary. We went to a cool restaurant, Rodizio Rico. And while we could have stuffed ourselves, we were actually quite restrained. Yes, we were full at the end of the evening...but not crazy full. It was fun and a great ending to a wonderful day!

27 October 2006

Doggy Love

Today on the GG website, we are talking about the dogs we have adopted or the ones we'd like to. In seeing all of this, I decided to finally check out the Dog Trust website that I've seen on the t.v. ( http://www.dogstrust.org.uk/) and sponsor a dog. I'm sponsoring Harvey. If you live in the UK, I'm urging you to contribute to the site in some way. If you live in the US, then check out the following site: Nikeno's Second Chances and sponsor a dog there. Either way, our best friends will be the winners!

I adopted a dog named Amber a few years ago. I had to move to a place that didn't accept dogs and my brother & sis-in-law decided to take her in. She now gets to live on a boarding school campus and have lots of love. Adopting a dog who had been abused before was one of the best things I ever did. She became a bundle of love. If I get another chance someday to have a back garden, I'll definately get another abandoned dog!

25 October 2006

Memories

So. What is your first memory as a child? The thing that comes to my mind is quite interesting. I grew up on a boarding school campus. We were living in the second floor of a big ol' Victorian house that was across the street from the rest of the campus. It was next to the gym, which was great as I could run around in there and make lots of noise on the wooden floors (remember those days?).

My first memory is one on the campus. It was a cool morning. I was in my favorite feety pajamas and we were heading to breakfast in the cafeteria (we all got free food which my mom LOVED). I remember being able to fit between the metal rungs in one area of the fencing...someone has pulled them apart a bit. I must have been 3 or 4 at the time. And the ground was crunchy and I had freedom to run across the field to the caf. My mom didn't have to worry about anyone snatching me or me getting hurt...there were always people around.

It's such a happy memory. I was a lucky child - my early life was very easy and was full of people who hugged me a lot. From around 4 to 7, I lived in a new place, a boy's dorm. And the boys thought I was cool. It gave them the opportunity to be sweet - they could hold a little girl on their lap and make faces...cause, ya know, it's only a little kid. And in those days, no one would worry about pediphaelia. It allowed a little girl to have a bunch of big brothers and a bunch of boys to be able to show a soft side...one they rarely were able to show without getting made fun of by the others.

Yup - I was lucky.

24 October 2006

Mehndi

If you've been reading my blog, you'll remember that I'm having a mixed religion ceremony...Hindu and Christian. In addition, I'll be celebrating both South Asian and American/UK traditions during the wedding/reception. One such tradition in South Asia is something called mehndi. Mehndi is a 'temporary tattoo' of sorts. You apply henna to the skin, allow it to dry and then keep away from water for a while. You can have all sorts of patterns and colours, though traditionally the colours are a reddish brown to black.

Most South Asian brides have a mehndi ceremony before their wedding, where you get very cool designs on your hands and feet. More likely than not, I'll just have something more simple, as I'll have a friend work with me (she's an artist). I, too, am learning how to do this so that I can apply designs to my bridal party. So...I tried it this past weekend. Nothing too complicated but here's an example of what I did on my left hand:
It's nothing much but I was just curious about what a pre-made cone would do. I think I'd rather mix my own henna and work from there...plus as I'm not doing a ton of designs, I'll use a bottle with a metal tip instead of the bag.

I also put a pattern on my foot though the pic didn't come out well. I've done a lot of reading and found some cool stuff. Here's one pic of mehndi that I really like:

In this pic, the henna is still drying so you don't get to see the darkness of it...but I really like the patterns and would love something like it.

For my bridesmaids, I'll probably take aspects of this and use them to have something a touch more simple (it takes a load of time to do!).

23 October 2006

More wedding stuff

Today I got some news regarding the wedding weekend. My aunt (on my dad's side) has offered to pay for a post-wedding party...the Sunday brunch. This is HUGE! I'll probaby have anywhere from 50 to 75 out of town guests, so it'll be a chance to see them once again. Now I just have to figure out where to have this brunch. The hotel that I have booked for out of town guests does have a brunch but not sure if they could handle us...we'll have to see. Phone calls will be made this weekend!

Second bit of news - we can host the rehearsal dinner at my old boarding school in a big conference room. We'll order in pizza and wings. A nice place that will cost me NADA! And pizza and wings are easy and inexpensive. Oh, and lots of parking for everyone.

So two things that will cost me less than expected...woo hoo! A few more things figured out...a bit less stress for me!

It's amazing just how expensive this whole wedding thing is, especially if you have tons of family and lots of friends coming from other areas. It's actually the one thing that does stress me out about the wedding...I'm not worried about whether everything is 'perfect'...which may make me a non-bridezilla...whatever that is!

21 October 2006

You know you've been in UK too long when...

*You pick out a hover mower and are more interested in how long the electric cord is rather than asking the staff where the self propelled mowers are located.

* You have given up complaining about lack of drive up ATMS and parking miles away from the shops. You have actually purchased a rolling shopping bag.

* You start to accept queuing (getting in a line) as a way of life.

*You think a Nissan is a big truck

*When approaching a round-about the thought of how much easier it would be to just turn right no longer crosses your mind as you fight the merging traffic to go in an almost complete circle.

* You expect men to actually cut, comb and style their hair (using hair products). And to wear high street clothes. Jeans and a T-shirt are no longer socially acceptable.

* You dissolve in laughter when listening to the funny accent of the Southern Americans on TV!

* You think $70 for a haircut is quite reasonable.

* You are on to your 19th umbrella and your second overcoat.

* You buy a disposable baby BBQ from Tesco.

* You start thinking English cuisine isn't all that bad after all, I mean, it's hard to beat a full English breakfast.

*You can cook entire meal not using a can, jar,box or packet.

*You think lamb & Mint, Marmite Yeast Extract, pickled onion, Roast chicken, and steak & Onion are normal flavours for Crisps. (Potatoe Chips)

* You have given up explaining why you are half an hour late to work as no-one notices or cares.

* Coming to work with a hangover is entirely accepted and indeed expected at least once a week.

* You begin to believe that a family day out involves taking the kids to the local pub.

* You don't even bother looking out of the window when you get up in the morning to check what the day is like. You know it is overcast.

* More than three hours sunlight on summer days seems excessive.

* You only just realise you have lost your Sunglasses, you left them on a visit back home 2 summers ago.

* You realise your sunburn cream is the stuff you originally bought from home with you.

* A day at the beach means wearing the warmest clothes you own while standing on golf ball-size pebbles and the thought of swimming doesn't even enter your head.

(These are thanks to a poster at UK-Yankee.com)

While all of these don't apply to me, they do apply to some people in the UK...and do explain a lot about the culture. I find them quite amusing!

20 October 2006

Baby cakes...

Today I began the topic of development in my psychology class. I love to talk about pregnancy as most kids really don't know what goes on in there. I showed a film that had pictures from within the womb and then we talked about what develops on the body & when. It's facinating at what our cells are able to do in such a short period of time. Humans are amazing!

When my mom was preggers, she was so excited. She couldn't believe that a life would be coming out of her body. And she almost got me as a Christmas gift. I decided to hang on though and arrive the following day. I gave the first hint of my coming at around 4am. She ended up at the hospital at 8:30am. There she stayed for a while...contractions and all. And then it got close to time. But something went wrong. She had a contraction that held. One that lasted at least 15 minutes - they don't know as they weren't keeping an eye on it. But it meant that I was not getting the oxygen that I needed.

When I was born at around 10pm, I was given the Apgar test. My score was a 1. It is not good at all! The first time my dad saw me, I was in a nurse's arms being run to the neonatal unit...he said I looked like a blue coloured rag doll...nothing was working in me hardly at all.

The worst part for my parents is that he had to wait for a full year to see if this had taken any effect...would I end up being brain damaged in any way? Well...it seems as if it didn't have any major effect, though I'm sure my lack of ability in languages and short term memory issues might have something to do with it. But irregardless I turned out okay. I went from almost lifeless to a very happy baby to a decently okay adult.

R. & I have talked about trying to have kids. At my age, it kinda scares me. Will I have the energy? Will I actually be able to have a child? Could I handle a baby with mental or physical issues? I think whatever happens, we'll deal.

19 October 2006

Food for thought

I am proud of myself. I'm in the midst of the dreaded monthlies and as always, have been craving both salt and chocolate. But I have resisted. Last night after eating dinner, R. and I had to run to the store to get milk and shaving cream. I declared that I wanted chocolate. Despite my previous declaration of wanting to lose weight (R. decided he wants to jump on this bandwagon to). R. was so excited about chocolate. Well...we got to the store and went to the candy isle. And ya know what. I decided NOT to get chocolate or the crisps that were calling out my name. Woo hoo. I may not have gone to the gym yesterday, and I ate a bit too much at dinner...but I took the first step. And that decision will help as will every other positive one I make.

We returned from the store probably around 8:15pm. R. made himself some hot chocolate (he calls it hot milk, which I still think is quite funny) and he made me some tea (too much milk late at night is not good for my tummy). And then we went to bed. We sat drinking our drinks for a while, chatting, and then turned off the lights and chatted for about 1-1/2 hours. We call it our bed talk time. Usually it happens every night for about a 1/2 hour, but with being tired, we decided to get into bed really early and hope for an early bed hour for sleep. 10ish wasn't too bad and we were able to talk about a lot of stuff...hopes, dreams, etc. I love that time. And we also got a good night sleep too!

Now for the only bad thing. I forgot to put my engagement ring back on after doing my hair. I hate getting all the gooey stuff on my ring while working it into my hair, so I take it off and put it by my bedside. And I forgot about it. I was rushing around doing stuff...and I forgot. So I'm here at work feeling all nekked. I've had the ring for long enough that it's become a part of me. And I feel guilty. Like I'm hiding something. But I'm not. So the lesson learned here...move my ring box into the bathroom so that I can put it on immediately after doing my hair instead of waiting until later.

18 October 2006

Gain and loss

171 Days to go until the wedding. While it sounds like quite a few days, it's a lot less than I wanted to have when actually starting to lose some weight. And yes, I know I've talked about it a ton, but I haven't gotten off my sweet ass to actually do anything about it. And somehow I did lose a few pounds, but not enough.

When I was living on my own in Boston, I ate quite healthily. Yes, there were days I ate junk, but overall I kept away from sweets and didn't eat things like crisps or chips (chips or french fries). But here it seems as if all bets are off. I've been eating like a teenager and it's just not working. Thus gaining 15 pounds in the 2 years I've been here...and I've gone up 2 sizes. It's not that I'm fat or even heavy looking (I was quite thin beforehand).

So here it is. I'm starting. I'm going to try to lose at least 10 lbs. And I'm going to go to the gym to tone everything up. I used to get so many compliments on my legs - they were well muscled but not gross and kids in sports that I coached used to say they wanted legs like mine. Not anymore. But they will again!

There will be a few good things to come out of this fitness & weight loss program:

1. Fitting into clothing much better. And not having to buy new clothes as I have some lovely things that I just don't fit into. Saving money is good right now.

2. Getting into my wedding dresses and looking really good in them - toned arms in a sleeveless dress...check.

3. Getting fit. I'd like to be able to run around and not feel breathless. I want to go to hockey training and kick tushie.

4. Feeling better about myself. Overall I like who I am. I just don't like my bod at this moment. Yes, I know it's typical to women, but I did like my body overall 10 lbs ago, so I want to get back to that.

5. Better sex life. The better I feel about myself, the more I want it. And that will in turn make for a better relationship between R. and me!

So...171 days. I can do it. My hope is to lose at least 2 pounds by the end of the month. I'll let you know!

17 October 2006

Pictures from L'Estartit, Spain


Have to say...it was a fun time!

16 October 2006

The Visit

What does it mean to be a woman? What does it mean to be a man? Could I be detected if I wanted to live life as a man?

Today and tomorrow, Norah Vincent is visiting my classroom to talk about her experiences as a 'man' for one year. I find this facinating and hope that my classes do as well. It'll be a good feed into the chapter on developmental psychology which I've now chosen to do after this (instead of my usual sensation & perception topic).

It's an interesting topic. One that has been argued for centuries...our differences, our similarities. And even more so, how we deal with these. I know that it's been easier to be a therapist and a woman...it's so much more expected. But to get a job as a counselor in a school, you have an advantage if you are a man.

And then there's whether it's better to be a man or woman. R. and I have this argument all the time. Personally, I kinda like being a woman a lot.

14 October 2006

How to help a friend

How do you tell a friend that she ought not listen to her long distance boyfriend?

Last night we went out with my friend, A., and her boyfriend, P.. While hanging out with R., P. revealed that he doens't think that A. is the woman for his future. They have been dating off and on for 10 years. And A. is planning on moving back to the States for him as she thinks he's going to marry her or at least make her his lifelong partner. Why does she think that? He says things such as 'see...that's why I haven't given you a ring yet' or 'yes, I think it would be interesting to find a job in the UK'. He gives her just enough to make her think he's into her...and she ignores the other things he says that point in a bad direction. He told R. that he doesn't see himself married or having children. Two things A. really wants. And she's convincing herself that she could just live with him, not getting married.

I so don't want her to give up a job she loves in this city she loves for someone who is lying to her. To someone who just doesn't have the balls to just break it off. To someone who wants to cheat on her (confirmed) and most likely already has (not confirmed).

If she was going to move to be closer to her family or because she truly wanted to be back in the States, then I would be all for it. I'd miss her but I'd support this. But not for a guy who won't commit.

What do I say to her? I can't divulge his conversation with R. But I also don't want her to be hurt in the long run and give up her London opportunity. Sigh. Boys suck sometimes.

12 October 2006

When a sweater saved the day

There are many reasons to love autumn in London. The nights are cooler so sleeping is very comfy, particularly under a warm duvet. People want to snuggle up a lot more so love seems to be in the air. And best of all...big sweaters.

Last night I went out with a workmate, her boyfriend and a few others. We went to Belgo Noord for the mussels and beer. Now, I haven't been drinking beer in order to try to lose some weight (it hasn't really helped to be honest). So...I decided to have a few last night. Belgium beers are particularly yummy as was the food. But the downside of drinking beer when you're not used to it is found in the next morning. Beer bloat.

Now coupled with PMS and the beer bloat, finding something to wear this morning was a touch rough. The outfit I had chosen the night before just wasn't right with my big ol' tummy. So I found the ultimate autumn outfit...slouchy trousers and a slightly roomy cable knit sweater from the States. It's a lovely periwinkle colour so it doesn't look too ick. I look rather New Englandy I'd say with my clogs on the feet. And my tummy is not exposed too much...is it sweater or is it tummy? :-)

So, autumn is good for those fat days, while still remaining warm enough not to need the big winter coat. Ah...memories of American football and hot cocoa...one of those few things I miss from the States.

10 October 2006

The thing about scuba that is totally cool is that it's like flying but underwater. At least once you learn how to do it.

I remember my first trip to learn scuba. I was quite nervous about it. We're not meant to be attempting to breathe underwater...but I did. You start off with a snorkle and swim around. As someone who had never even done that, it was a bit off-putting. I'm so used to breathing through my nose, but you can't or you end up snorting water (and yes, I did this to the kids delight). Then they get you into your gear. It's frickin' heavy above water. With a weight belt, strapped into a kit with a huge tank and in a wetsuit, you feel a bit claustrophobic. And we weren't doing this in a pool like most people...no, we were in the ocean from the start. So vision was a bit touchy. You learn how to use the instruments on the gear and as you release air from your BCD (like a life jacket), you slowly sink. As you head down into the water, you have to 'equalize', which means you learn to get rid of that pressure building up in your ears (like the pressure you feel when you fly but worse). If you can't do this, you can't dive. You have to go down slowly or you WILL feel pain.

Then at bottom (about 8 meters), you do tasks...like letting water into your mask and then getting rid of it. Now who in their right mind WANTS water in their mask? It's an awful feeling and you definitely get water up your nose. Ick! But you learn how to do it well. Then you learn how to take the entire mask off and put it back on. Even worse! But the hardest thing to do is to remove your breathing apparatus and breathe the air bubbles while letting it free flow through your regulator (the breathing ap). It's SCARY. But I survived this last year. And got my Scuba Diver certification.

This year was a walk in the park in comparison. Yes, I had to remove my mask and put it back on. Yes, I had to remove all my gear and put it back on. But I knew how to do it. And it wasn't as scary. I'm glad that I had this break in-between as I was able to have some time to think about it all during the year in the middle.

We got to go on dives that were amazing. At one point, I was hovering at 15 meters and a school of fish surrounded me. Tons of shiny blue & brown fish just swimming around. Orange starfish dotting the surface. An eel that seemed quite nervous. A fish that looked like the spiney coral bits below. It was SO COOL.

Never in my mind did I think that this would be something I'd want to do. But I really like it. I don't have the money to go on lots of trips and R. doesn't know how to do it so I'd hate to go on my own...but I may try it on my honeymoon in St Lucia. I'm just happy to have been given this amazing opportunity. I love working at this school!

09 October 2006

Scuba

I'm baaaa-ccck!

So. Where was I and what the heck was I doing? Well...three adults (including me) took a group of 24 students scuba diving in L'Estartit, Spain. Each year our school hosts trips in both the UK and in the Continent. I did the trip last year and have to say that this year was even better.

We left VERY early a.m. from school and headed off to the airport. We finally made it to our place a few hours later and began the process of getting scuba gear. I was most excited as I was going to end up certified as an Open Water Diver and have a few dives toward my advanced certification. And I made it. As did most of our kids. We had a ton of beginners who ended up with Scuba Diver certs and a few who went on to become more advanced. Only 2 dropped out...which is not bad.

Excitingly, we had a group of kids who were good beans. They got quiet when we asked and seemingly didn't do anything bad. Not a bad trip. And on top of it, it was warm and I got some sun. Sweet!

03 October 2006

Spain at 6am

Going to Spain for a few days. Taking kids from work. Cross fingers I survive! ;-) Will tell stories when I get back....

02 October 2006

A Momentus 150th Post

I met the future in-laws. Yup, R's parents.

Sunday started off at 8am for me. I woke up on my own and just couldn't get back to sleep. So I got up, turned on the t.v. and decided to put together a small cabinet that we just hadn't gotten to. We needed the extra storage.

Then finally R. woke up (probably due to the hammering sound around 9am). We sat, had tea, discussed our action plan for the day and then had breakfast. The day before R had seemed like he wanted to do a lot that day to get ready for his parents, but he was a lump for a while. I think the stress of everything had hit. Finally at 11am I told him he had to get ready to run our errands...and he did.

We went to the mall, Brent Cross, to pick up a pair or two of new shoes for me for work (bad shoes from States!), to go to Boots and to pick up moisturizer at the Body Shop. I found two pairs of cute work shoes (one may have to get returned...we'll see), found some makeup I wanted and R. got his yummy smelling moisturizer for his dry bod.

We did this in less than 1 hour and headed home to start lunch for his folks, as well as finish cleaning the house. I was a mad woman - cleaned the bathroom (again), wiped down the kitchen (again), R. vaccuumed a ton and we straightened things up. The flat looked quite lovely by the end. And then I began to make the fajitas! Yup, I was going to introduce them to a bit of Americana (the bit that I like). So sliced up some veg and chicken, poured spice all over them and stir-fried away. Before putting them in the oven for the final cook/keeping warm, I added a touch of salsa so nothing would dry out.

And then we waited.

They showed up precisely at 2pm. And I got a smile from his mum and a gruff hello from his father. We went and sat on the couch for a bit of small talk. As you can suspect, it was awkward! Finally R. suggested that we go and eat (I was starving so happy he did so)...and it got a bit less weird. Things relaxed. And they enjoyed my meal (or at least it seemed like they did). We then went and sat back on the couch and we relaxed. Phew. I actuallly was having some fun. Dad relaxed and we got into a conversation about family. Mum smiled at me a lot. I was even invited to their house this weekend to meet an aunt. They remained in our flat until about 4:30 or so. And smiled at me as they left.

Both R. & I were relieved...and exhausted...happy it went okay!